Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Dear Mom:

Back then, I still remember the times when you would workout in the morning dressed in spandex tights and bands like those fitness ladies you see on tv during the 80s and I would just jump around imitating your actions, thinking it was strange and slightly funny to do so. Sometimes we would walk around the lake, look at the baby geese, ducklings and swans swimming around and attempt to chase/catch them ( Once a duckling started to think I was the mother and started to follow us around. ><) We used to gossip about my endeavors at school like when a particular boy and I were dared to kissed each other on the cheek in front of all the second graders after school or how I was the only girl who was in the 'football club' composed of a bunch of rowdy yet funny third grade boys but still loved to play with barbie dolls and house with the girls. Yeeeup. I was a player back then. B]. lol jk.

We started to talk to each other less once we moved and even more so when dad got sick and you became the primary breadwinner for our family. Once I started high school, the only times we'd talk to each other would be when you would tell me to go to sleep earlier or go on your whole 'don't get a boyfriend or else you'll pretty much ruin your life' schpeel -_-. It always bothered me how I had to lie to you about who I was hanging out so you wouldn't give me that look of disapproval whenever I hung out with a group of boys, which I did often. Instead of hanging out with 'Jessica' 'Jordan (girl)' and 'Tiffany', it really would be 'John' 'Jordan (boy)' and 'Adam'.

Anyways, I've noticed that we've been trying to talk to each other more and I'm really glad about that. I'm sorry that I usually miss your calls -_-. Most of the time, the phone is in another room and by the time I notice your call, it's late at night. I'm also sorry that I'm not as fluent in Cantonese as I could be. I really wish we could have that type of mother daughter relationship where we could just tell each other EVERYTHING like we used to but if you could trust me and the decisions I make with regards to school, dating and the people I hang out with, I'd feel a lot more comfortable.

Thanks for everything though.

Love,

Jennifer